Solve your Relationship problems with...
        the New Agreement Solution.


 

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Salvage your Relationship with a New Agreement

So, what exactly is a relationship?

A relationship is an agreement
about who you will be for them and they for you.
--Darel Rutherford

You'll easily solve all your relationship problems...

...once you see that life works by agreement.

Because then you'll see that the BEING solution for your problem is to choose a new way of BEING in that relationship. And the DOING solution for your relationship problem is to make a new agreement.

Is this a picture of you and your dog?

For example:

If your dog jerks you around from pillar to post when you’re taking it for a walk, you obviously have an agreement with your dog that it, not you, is in charge of the walk.

If your boss jerks you around at work, you must realize that he/she couldn’t do this without your permission. Your response to mistreatment, when it happened the first time, set the stage for it to happen again and again.

If you see yourself as the victim in a relationship, you may be surprised to learn that you have an agreement with that person that it’s okay for you to be pushed around. Think about it!

For the purpose of this discussion, we’re not concerned with who’s doing what to whom; what matters here is that you come to realize that your relationships are based on unwritten agreements about how you will relate to each other. 

Only you can decide who you will be in any given relationship. If you don't like the way it's going, choose a new way of BEING!

You will be the victim in any relationship
for as long as you continue to play the victim role
--Darel Rutherford

So, how do you deal with non-working relationships?

Just smile and then change the agreement. One of life’s greatest revelations is the realization that you have unconsciously made an agreement with each and every person in your reality—an agreement about who you will be for them and they for you. Once you begin to see all relationships as unwritten agreements, you will have found the power to transform the quality of your life forever. From that moment on, when a relationship rubs you the wrong way, you’ll simply smile and propose a change in the agreement!

When you’re tired of being jerked around by your dog, a gentle pull on the leash, from time to time, will let your dog know that you are taking control. When it gets the message, you will have made a new agreement with your dog. The solution to your relationship with your boss or a friend might be handled just as easily. You may want to begin by asking yourself who you would be BEING if he or she no longer felt free to treat you in that manner. Then, having made your new BEING decision, you would be empowered to make a new agreement with that person about how you will be treated in the future.

He or she may not agree, but so what? Without the new agreement, the relationship doesn’t work for you anyway. You have made a new BEING choice, and the new you no longer fits the old mold.

 You chose the role don't

Don’t resent your boss for being the jerk (if he is). Your boss is doing you the favor of allowing you to experience life from the role of being the victim in that relationship.

The value gained from such an experience comes when you finally realize that you chose the victim role because you needed the experience. Accepting this truth gives you the power to make a new BEING choice, and your newfound power makes your victory even sweeter.

Ready solve that relationship problem now?

To learn how a new BEING commitment gives you the power to make new agreements, you may want to read chapter 18 of BEING THE SOLUTION.

To order your copy click here...