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Why not...
...Try A different way of looking at the problem?
I think you know:
You can never solve a
problem
with the same
mind set in which the problem was created.
So wouldn't the
solution for your problem
be a simple change in your mind-set?
Here's
the mind-set in which
the problem now exists and persists:
"He cheated on me!
How
can I ever trust him again?"
You've been betrayed by the man you
trusted. He's strayed from the nest, had an affair with another woman!
You're angry and broken hearted!
A
change of
perspective
When you're angry, broken hearted
and feeling betrayed, it's almost impossible to feel positive in any way
about your situation. So, go ahead -- experience out your anger and hurt.
Get most of it out of the way.
Then when you're able to think more
clearly about what's next for you, you'll want to take back your power,
choose out of that victims role.
"He did it to me." is definitely a
victim's story. In such a case as this, you've given him the power to make
you angry and to hurt you. Only after you've taken back your power
will you be able to know what's next for you, and then to choose past your problem.
Don't let him back into your life
until you've chosen out of the victim's role.
He's betrayed you. The question, now
is can you ever forgive him? Can he earn your trust ever again? Those are questions for you to decide, but
here's a word of advice:
It's time for a new agreement! If you let him
back into your life without a new agreement, you've established a pattern
and the chances are, he'll do it again.
The only way you'll have the power
to negotiate a new agreement with him and make it stick, is to choose out of the relationship
and then agree to choose back into it under that new agreement.
"Every relationship is an unwritten
agreement about who we will be in
it"
-- Chapter
7, Agreements,
So, Why Aren't You Rich?
by Darel Rutherford
To learn how to find the power to
make your new agreement, you might want to read:
So, Why Aren't You
Rich?
The real key to a happy
relationship:
"The quality of your life is bound to improve
once your learn that
life works only by agreement"
-- Chapter
7, Agreements,
So, Why Aren't You Rich?
by Darel Rutherford
BEING THE SOLUTION
The real key to a happy
relationship:
"When you build a
fire of anger in your heart,
guess who gets burned"
-- Chapter 15, Solving Relationship Problems,
BEING THE SOLUTION
But the real solution
(not just
a band aid)
for your
"not the woman I married" problem,
would a more significant shift
in your way of BEING in that relationship
To accomplish that you might
want to
sign up for the BEING Workshop
About the being
workshop
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